Our Husbands…

StressedWe all know that men and women are totally different. One of the many ways we are different is how we deal with things when we are upset or just need to talk. Men want to fix things but when it comes to us women it can me hard to figure out just how to do that. Sometimes when I unload on my hubby because my emotions are getting the best of me or I just need to talk I will tell him before hand, “I don’t want you to fix this or come up with a solution. I just want you to listen and then hug me and let me know that everything is going to be ok.” He is so happy with doing that. It takes the burden off of him to try and figure out how to “fix” it and he gets to help in the process. What husband doesn’t love that? Our husbands really do want to help but a lot of the times they feel helpless so they do detach. This helps them from doing that.

I was reading in Genesis the other night and came across this text, which I am sure you have all heard or read many times. And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” Genesis 2:18(NKJV) The Message version puts it this way, “God said, “It’s not good for the Man to be alone; I’ll make him a helper, a companion.”” Genesis 2:18(MSG) The Good News version, “Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to live alone. I will make a suitable companion to help him.”” Genesis 2:18(GNT)

Any way you read it we are to help our husbands not add more stress to their lives.

Here is an excerpt out of a book that has really helped me over the years, The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands by Dr. Laura Schlessinger. I highly recommend adding this book to your marriage tool bag. I will be quoting from it often in my writings to you.

“Men really are not as complicated as we think they should be. Men love to hear that their woman is happy and that they are the source of this happiness. Men deserve the same respect you would show a visitor in your him – even more. Men love to be complimented. They also like to be admired. I always thank my husband for working so hard for us, and I encourage the kids to do so, too. Men are grumpy when they are tired and/or hungry. Anything they say while they are in either one of these states is not to be taken seriously. Men don’t like it when women talk about them behind their backs. Men are not your ‘daddies’, they are your contemporaries and get stressed and scared about things just like you do. And if you were a real friend, you would ease their burdens, not add to them. Men have dreams, too, and it doesn’t matter if it’s logical or not, don’t walk all over them.

This doesn’t mean that we don’t have problems – everyone does – but it’s a lot easier to work them out with a man who knows you love and respect him.”

It has been said that a good number of men want respect more than love. A lot of times men feel that they come last, in their feelings and in their needs. Let’s let our husbands know that is not true.


Happy Husband and Wife


What Happens When We Don’t Pray


What happens when we don’t pray. In a nut shell, all hell can breaks loose.

Something happened to me a few weeks ago and it didn’t set well with me. There was no reason for it to bug me, but Satan went right to work on me. What I should have done was get right down on my knees and ask God for help. I did not. Instead I asked a friend to pray for me. Thank God she did or I am not sure how long I would have been feeling out of sorts. Have you ever known you should get on your knees and pray but you find that you just can’t seem to get there? I don’t even necessarily mean literally get on our knees, even shooting up an arrow prayer asking for divine help, seems out of ready. Have you ever felt this way? That is exactly where I was at. I couldn’t even shoot up an arrow prayer. Why I could ask my friend to pray for me is beyond me, but I could and I did. This is one of the many reasons it is good to have friends who pray together. On a scale of 1-10 of things going bad when you don’t or can’t pray this was just a 2. Not bad at all, but it sure does impress upon me to pray, even when I feel I can’t. At least I had the good sense to ask someone to pray on my behalf. Whatever it takes to get that prayer up to God, do it! I would love to hear from you. Let me a note. Let me know if you have ever felt that you were stuck and couldn’t pray and how you got past it.

The Struggle of Spending Time with God

The struggle of spending time with God seems to hit us all, no one seems to be exempt. In some groups I am in and blogs I read it seems to be an epidemic problem. In our busy lives we struggle to find quiet time or even pockets of quiet time to spend with God. This should not be so hard but Satan has gone out of his way to make sure we live in such a busy busy world that it keeps us distracted from God as much as possible.

We go about our daily lives doing the laundry, dishes, making the beds, cooking, dusting, vacuuming, mopping, being a taxi driver and the list goes on and on and on. Where does our quiet time with God fit in? When do we seek God? When do we listen for Him? What if during all our “doing” we try to stay connected to Him? What would that look like for you?

It seems like sometimes, ok most of the time we give God some time here or there, wherever it is most convenient for us. What if God was interwoven in everything we did? I can’t help but wonder if I have God interwoven in everything I do all day long if I would not struggle so much, that the “time” would just happen.

In this book I am reading, Women Living Well by Courtney Joseph, it suggests doing a prayer walk through your house, praying while cleaning room to room. Dust a picture, pray for that person. Making your bed, pray for your husband’s spiritual walk or lack of and your marriage, that it will glorify God. Making your side of the bed don’t forget to pray for yourself. Picking up your kids laundry, pray for each one. In the kitchen wiping down the chairs again pray for each family member.

Write down a Bible verse, read it often throughout the day, think about what it means, pray about the verse and ask God to give you some new insight about it. Another way to keep connected to God is while cooking or ironing (yes, there are some women who still iron) listen to a sermon online or listen to Bible audio. I have James Earl Jones reading the New Testament and I love listening to him read. Interweave God into EVERYTHING you do. How many times have you taken the iPhone or iPad into the bathroom to do your thing to check Facebook status, emails, play a game or read the news? Really? Am I the only one on the planet to do this? I think not! Try replacing the “i” gadgets with the Bible. Nuff said, you get the picture 🙂

When we make God the main focus in everything we do this time problem seems to go away. He is there all the time. As we talk with our husband, children and our family and friends include God in the conversation.

I challenge you to get God involved in absolutely everything you do in your day to day life and see if it makes a difference. Leave me a message and let me know how it goes for you and how you are getting God involved in your day.